Enough Said

Little Chomper

Ben has a tooth! I just happened to notice it while he was smiling...this little whitish spot on the top of his bottom gum. There's not much sticking out so a pic of it will come later. For now, here's a random shot.

What Do Ben And Ned Flanders Have In Common?

To the untrained eye, this picture is just Ben in a high chair. Look closer, there are a few important things going on here. First, Ben has learned to pick up little pieces of cereal and put them in his mouth. I know what your thinking...I've seen chimpanzees do that with their own poop, big deal. Well, it is a big deal, it's a major developmental step. Ok, here's the real reason I'm excited. He's doing it with his left hand!!! I was fine with a boy or girl. When he's older, he can be straight or gay. He might like running better than swimming. But I'll be damned if my firstborn son is a righty! I already want to go out and buy him a pair of "special" scissors.

Coffee Break

Ben needed a little rest while eating breakfast the other morning. I guess the Starbucks wasn't strong enough for him.

I Bet You Think This Song Is About You

Hey, who's that?
How you doing? I'm Ben.
Oooh Baby, you're a good kisser.
My son (the one doing calculus in the previous picture) spent 5 minutes making out with his reflection on the side of our trash can. Vanity is my favorite sin

...Carry The Four...

He got really pissed when Caryn tried to take the calculator away. He may look like Caryn, but I finally have evidence that he is also my son. Don't forget to distribute the 5 Ben.

Nostalgia

I was looking back at old pictures of Ben's first day. This will sound cliche but I really don't remember him being this little...especially when I'm holding a squirmy 20 pound not-so-little boy. In 6 months, he's almost tripled his weight! He's like a weed...and much like a weed showing up in your garden, he has a tendency to show up in places where you don't want him to be (trying to crawl inside your printer or licking your flip flop).

Time Flies

Today is Bennet James's 6 month birthday. It sounds incredibly cliche but they do grow up so fast. (Bennet has an interview with Intel tomorrow. Maybe he can start earning his keep.) I've had a great time writing this blog both when Ben was still Fee and since his birth. Bennet is so active now I don't have time to think about life, I'm just living it. Before he was born, Caryn and I spent a lot of time wondering what a baby would be like. Then, during the first few months, he basically slept, ate, or cried and for 2 of those occasions, I was free to ponder and post. Now, I rarely even turn on the computer let alone download pictures (I still take plenty though).

First Date

Counting just this picture, Bennet already has had more girlfriends than I had by the age of 17. Look at the little stud...hand on Hailey's thigh. He's pretending to watch Sesame Street but in his mind, he's saying "just a little higher, don't screw this up, does my breath stink, I wish our moms weren't here." Son, I can give you no more advice...it's obvious you already know more than me.

Army Dude

Does this count as crawling? Last week he was pushing his face across the floor so at least he's improved from that. He has this snake move down but has gotten his knees under himself a few times. Ben is a mere 169 days old. He's really accomplished a lot from his "2008 to-do list." Because of these most recent developments, I had to install cat doors, put covers on electrical sockets, and stop leaving my collection of ancient ninja fighting weapons lying around. The worst part is that the more mobile he becomes, the more he'll burn calories...goodbye thunder thighs, although I didn't know you long, I loved to squeeze your sweet soft skin.

Dad Found The Black And White Setting

Black and white photos just look more professional. I don't know what people did before digital cameras. I've taken over 2,000 pictures of Ben so far in just under 6 months. At 24 pictures per roll of film, that's 83 rolls times $13.00 per role which equals $1,079 dollars worth of pictures, most of which would be out of focus or shots of my finger in front of the lens. Ben is my muse and digital allows me to explore the possibilities without paying for mistakes. Sorry Kodak.

Thunder Thighs

This is the only time in one's life when having thighs like this is celebrated. I can't get my hand around those spicy sausages. They've got this firm yet marshmallowy feeling and yes, I do want to eat them. Bonus: all that loose flabby skin is perfect for making fart noises...a favorite activity of the Brof-men.

Where's My Updates?

I realize my posts have been pretty sparse. Ben's been doing so many new things lately that I haven't had time to write about them. Quick summary:
As of his 4 month check up, he's still 90% in height and weight. (17.6 pounds and 26.75 inches)
He can roll like a steam roller.
He's just starting to be able to sit up but still doing the face plant.
He'll have a full conversation with you as long as you pretend to know what he's saying.
Baby laughter cures depression, headaches, and exhaustion.
Baby screams cause depression, headaches, and exhaustion.
Ben has eaten peas, pears, banana, cereal, peaches, green beans and squash (his favorite)
Bennet loves making farting sounds with his mouth.
Even more, he loves doing it with food in his mouth thus spraying mommy and daddy with partially digested fruit.

This is really a fun time for me as a dad because Ben and I are at the same maturity level (i.e. farting sounds). He seems like a new baby every day. The one downside is that his diapers have taken on a whole new smell that I can only describe as "indescribable." (unless you've had kids, then you know that bouquet all too well).

Hallelujah

Today, Bennet completed his prerequisite for entering heaven by being baptized. He spent the ENTIRE ceremony talking and kicking his feet. He gave a "wazz-up" to every member of the congregation. In his defense, he was being extra manly because his Christening gown looked a little like a wedding dress for babies. In my defense, my grandmother made it and numerous grandchildren and great grandchildren have been baptized in it. I really have to thank Ben's new Godparents for coming to witness the baptism. My brother Dave and his fiancee Tria flew in from Berkeley, CA and Leigh and Chris drove down from Buffalo (I think that's in Canada or something). Leigh and Dave are now God-Husband and God-Wife. Start teaching my son how to be spiritual and stuff! The power of Christ compels you!

525,600 Minutes

One year ago today my life changed forever. I was in the office working (i.e. surfing the net for celebrity gossip) when all of the sudden Caryn started screaming "Oh my God" from the bedroom. It was the kind of scream she usually reserves for large insects or winning lottery tickets. Come to think of it, the mix of really scared and really excited is actually the perfect reaction to seeing a pink "+" show up on a stick you just peed on. Now, I didn't know she had taken a pregnancy test. My reaction to the scream was immediate. As soon as I finished reading the article on Jessica Alba's new bikini, I ran top speed down the hall to see what the commotion was. Caryn couldn't speak but she was holding the aforementioned stick. Using my powers of deduction, I realized Caryn was probably screaming because we were out of pregnancy tests. I immediately apologized because in the name of science, I had used a few to test my own pee, a glass of lemonade, and the spoiled milk in the fridge. (The juice and I were negative but the bad milk was inconclusive). Finally, Caryn said "I think I'm pregnant!" The next hour is a blur but there was a lot of "Oh my God", "This is crazy", "I love you", and "I have super sperm!" It's been a whirlwind 365 days but one hell of a ride. Happy anniversary Fee!

Do You Like See-Food?

Ben's started eating cereal; that lovely gray-brown mix of oatmeal and formula. We put a little on a spoon and as we moved it towards his mouth, he just opened right up. It's like he's been eating for years. I feel like any day now he's going to look up at me and say, "Dad, can we go get a burrito?"

My How Things Have Changed

For Memorial Day last year, I was with some friends from college at a lake house in Virginia. Here's the schedule from Saturday exactly one year ago. (make sure you read the previous memorial day entry below).

10-ish - Wake up, eat a donut
10:30 - Bloody Mary's - the breakfast of champions
11:30 - Started drinking (bloody mary's don't count) because we realized it was close enough to noon.
12:00 - Hot Dogs
1:30 - Hey, Barry and Caryn made Rum Punch!!!
1:38 - 5:00 [scene missing]
6:00 - Hamburgers and switched to drinking beer because I have to wake up at some point tomorrow.
Scattered throughout the day were games of beer pong and peeing in a lake.

...memories...

Say Cheese

It's hard out here for a pimp
He is chewing on everything
Kissy lips

Happy Memorial Day!

Here is Saturday's schedule

Ben wakes up around 6:00AM
Change and feed baby
Play with baby until around 9:00
Change and feed Ben
Put him down for his morning nap
Go to babies-r-us and buy stuff (it's like the grocery store, if you go in without a list, you come home with WAY more than you planned).
Go to plant nursery and get flowers for deck (Chris and Fiona, your roses didn't make it, sorry) (The lilies are flourishing though)
Home around 12:00 for lunch (both us and Ben).
Play with the baby, look at the baby, watching, judging
Around 3:00, he should go down for another nap. Caryn and I will vacuum, do laundry, clean.
Ben wakes up at 4:00, we'll probably go for a walk around the neighborhood for some fresh air
Change and feed Ben around 4:30
Dinner @ 5:30
Bathe Ben at 6:30
Read stories to Ben until 7:00
Feed last bottle and put in crib at 7:15
Sit on deck and have MAYBE 2 beers because Ben's going to wake up tomorrow at 6:00AM (sometimes 5:00) and I just need sleep!

(Steve, Barry,Matt, and Chris - I know I already sent this in an email but I wanted to share with everyone)

Bottles Bottles Everywhere So Let's All Have A Drink

I hate washing bottles. As soon as I finish, there's a new bottle sitting by the sink, staring at me, mocking my every attempt at keeping all the nipples clean (huh huh). I haven't proven it yet but I also think the toaster is laughing at me. We're using the Dr. Browns bottles which have numerous parts to wash. There's the bottle, nipple (huh huh), screw cap, bubble tube, and aerator. I don't know Dr. Browns credentials but he's inventing parts for the sole purpose of increasing my washing time. Ben has gone from 8 bottles a day to only 4 or 5 but I still feel like if I'm not holding him, I'm washing his "feeding system." So to all those out there with dry, cracked, dish soap hands I say, keep your nipples clean and your bottoms dry.

Rollin' Rollin' Rollin'

Check out Ben's new trick - it still hasn't gotten old (at least to us)

Things You Can Do With A 401K...

Roll over! Ben surprised us yesterday when Trudy (his wonderful sitter) told us she put Ben down for a nap on his back, came back later and discovered he was asleep on his stomach. Ben managed to roll from his back to his front. This is supposedly harder than stomach to back but he never takes the easy road. He woke up at 3 AM last night to show off his new trick but got frustrated that he didn't have the energy to roll back onto his back. Now, less than 48 hours later, he's like a steamroller. I guess we can't let him nap on his changing pad anymore.

7 Habits of Highly Effective Babies

Ben is officially out of his "Fourth Trimester." He sleeps through the night, we have a feeding schedule down, and he's stopped grabbing his belly button while screaming "why did you take me from that wonderful place!" I think all males live their life trying to get back in the uterus. It's not that we want to mate with anything that has boobs, it's the hope that we can "go home", so to speak. Too graphic? This isn't my point anyway...
Getting on with it, Caryn and I have started realizing that now is the time Ben will start to form habits; habits that can become VERY hard to break if continued. You start thinking "Am I letting him sleep in my arms too much? Should we still be swaddling him less? Should I not feed him when he's crying? What about the pacifier? How long should he nap? Is he too young to let him in the crib to cry it out? When do I go in and help him vs. leave him alone?" It's really starting to fill my mind with thoughts of a warped teenager who still sucks his thumb and needs to be wrapped up to sleep. You think everything you do will have long term consequences. Unfortunately, his "User Manual: The Guide to Bennet" got lost somewhere so we're flying off the cuff. I think every parent can sympathize with this. Wait until he starts eating real food. Do we go organic? Low sodium? Low sugar? Home made? Who knows? Ralph Wiggum for President.

Cat Coping Skills

Ladies and Gentleman, the Duchess of Sass (Reese) being escorted by Lord Bennet (the Duke of Pampers). From Ben's shirt, you can tell he's as cool as a cucumber. And Although Reese looks calm, I promise you the only thought in her head is "must resist eating baby's face...why is it touching me...find a happy place."
The cat actually seems to be ok with her demotion down the family hierarchy. She does miss the attention but rather than take it out on Ben, she's just been sleeping more...in her dreams, she is the almighty queen, ruler of all things fleece.

14 Weeks

Back To Work

Well it's been 3 days since Caryn went back to work and Ben went to "camp." He spends the day at a friends mothers' house and seems to be doing fine. I'm not surprised. She's great with babies and Ben has no idea where he is. As long as he's got a clean diaper and a bottle every few hours, he'd be happy being held by Hannibal Lecter....babies are so stupid. Caryn is doing great; happy to be out of the house conversing with adults but wondering why her arms feel so light. I went home for lunch the other day and it was so strange walking into my EMPTY house. No Ben, no Caryn, just the cat licking her butt...I didn't know what to do with myself (actually I danced around the living room ala "Risky Business" minus the tighty whities...minus Rebecca Demornay as well).

Iron Fist

Just yesterday Ben started gripping objects (mostly our fingers) and holding on tightly. It may seem like a small, forgettable skill but to people like Tiger Woods, grip is everything. Of course to an unladen swallow, it's not even a question of whether it grips...it's a simple weight/strength ratio. A 5 pound bird cannot grip a 10 pound coconut. Regardless, unless you're looking to migrate with a coconut, grip is important. I always fall back on Monty Python references, it's my safety net.

By the way, I think I have an idea who "commented" on the last blog entry about me selling more product and spending less time on the Internet. Maybe next time I see you, I'll be too preoccupied about the blog and forget your precious donuts...

So Much For A Dry Run

It has been exactly 12 weeks since Fee became Bennet. Because of that, Caryn had to go back to work today. This is the first time we both have to leave the house for work in the morning. We haven't figured out who does what yet. So, yesterday morning (Tuesday) was a rehearsal. Caryn pretended she was getting up for work and I actually got up for work. Things went pretty smoothly until I got an hour from home and realized I had forgotten to shave (I did however have pants on). I know what most of you are thinking, "Eric, you have the facial hair of a 17 year old." I admit I am no grizzly-man but there are certain places on my face that grow hair and need to get shaved every day. I don't have that cool, Jake Gyllenhaal unshaven but trendy look. I have the uneven, 17 year old, my parents haven't bought me a razor yet look. Oh well. I actually took the rest of the week off so we can do more practice runs. I took Ben to the grocery store around 11 and had no less than 3 hot moms tell me how cute Ben was. He's a total babe magnet...way more powerful than a puppy.

New Trick

The good news is that Ben can hold his head up really well. The bad news...it blows his frickin mind!!!! His face looks like "are you sure I'm supposed to be doing this?"

Bennet Heffner

Hey Ladies! Check out Ben's robe. It's comfortable and fashionable. In case you're wondering what he's wearing under there, let's just say he was feeling a bit Scottish that day.